


Anger is Easier

by squidnie



Category: The 100 (TV)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-06
Updated: 2016-02-06
Packaged: 2018-05-18 12:06:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,438
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5927761
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/squidnie/pseuds/squidnie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Emotions come to the surface when Bellamy sees Clarke again a few weeks after she decided to stay in Polis for the war council.</p>
<p>Written after 3.03. Contains spoilers for that episode.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Anger is Easier

**Author's Note:**

> So I really just wanted to write Angry!Bellamy after episode 3.03. Because really, that look he gave Clarke when he left? My heart.
> 
> This is vaguely Bellamy/Clarke but not really because he's pissed.
> 
> This is also unbeta'd, so I apologize for any mistakes.

If there was ever a time to keep his emotions in check, it would be now. But that knowledge did not keep Bellamy’s hands from gripping the table so hard his knuckles hurt, and it did not keep his heart from shuddering out a demanding rhythm against his ribcage whenever he looked at Clarke. The blonde was addressing them at the front of the council room, all business, her lips turned into a scowl.

She was beautiful. Bellamy hated her for it.

Everyone in the room was hanging on Clarke’s words. There was a tension in the air as her message sank in. The Ice Nation was launching an attack on Arkadia. The others in the room hardly reacted, too busy asking for details. Bellamy’s skin itched with the need to move, to act.

He sat silent as the council discussed plans. Skaikru wasn’t prepared to handle an attack from the Ice Nation. Everyone in the room had their own opinions as to what should be done. Some wanted to send out a small team to see what they were up against. Others wanted to use their available resources to gear up for the battle. They didn’t matter what they were facing, because they still needed time to prepare and they couldn’t waste that time.

Kane was shooting looks at Bellamy every few minutes, obviously expecting him an opinion on the subject. The younger man stayed silent, though, knowing that as soon as he opened his mouth he wouldn’t be able to shut it again until he yelled his voice hoarse. He didn’t want to do that in front of the highest authorities of Arkadia. He didn’t want to do it at all.

Kane’s voice rose above Bellamy’s thoughts and the quiet conversations around him. “We need to know what we’re up against. It’s worth sending a few scouts to see what kind of army the Ice Nation has.”

“I’ll do it,” Clarke volunteered. Bellamy’s head snapped up from where he was staring at his knees.

“No.” His voice was firm. He wasn’t to be argued with.

Clarke’s eyes arrowed and she stood up straighter. “I can stay out of sight. I’m quiet.”

“You’re also a flight risk.” It was a low blow. Bellamy knew that. He still couldn’t help the sense of satisfaction in his chest as a flicker of hurt darkened Clarke’s expression. “If you’re going, I’m going with you.”

There was a moment of complete stillness as Clarke met his gaze. The moment snapped when Abby spoke up.

“Then it’s settled. Clarke and Bellamy will scout the Ice Nation’s army and report back. Tonight. Hurry.”

Without another word, Bellamy grabbed his pistol and left the room. He heard a muffled curse behind him. Good, he thought, let Clarke be angry. Maybe that would make this easier.

He was out of the Ark and walking toward his tent by the time Clarke caught up to him. She didn’t say anything, just fell into step beside him with a front still on her face. He was beginning to think it was permanently etched there. When had been the last time that he’d seen her smile?

He knelt down on the floor of his tent. Clarke stood in the entrance. Bellamy would have thought she looked unsure if he didn’t know any better. “Do you have a gun?” His voice was rough. He handed Clarke a pistol when she shook her head, and stood back up. He watched her check the weight in her hands before setting off again toward the gate.

Bellamy didn’t wait to see if Clarke was following him. Once he made his way into the trees at the edge of the forest, though, he could hear her behind him. After a minute or so of listening to her breaking twigs, he huffed out an annoyed breath.

“I thought you said you could be quiet,” he snapped, turning to glare at the woman behind him. Clarke glared right back at him. Bellamy turned forward again without a word, pleased to note that he could no longer hear her behind him as he walked.

It was a long walk and they were short on time. Bellamy refused to take water breaks, and he only stopped once to hand Clarke a bit of venison before continuing on the trek. She thanked him wordlessly with a nod of her head. They didn’t talk.

The Ice Nation army was not as big as Bellamy had expected, but it was still enough to do considerable damage to the Skaikru if they weren’t ready for an attack. Clarke and Bellamy watched them for a few hours as they made a temporary camp, studying what they could see of the warriors and the weapons. Once satisfied with their knowledge, Bellamy left Clarke’s side without a word and started the walk back to Arkadia.

Clarke was angry. Bellamy could practically feel the heat rolling off her, feel her eyes on the back of his head as she followed him back to their people. He started counting at some point, curious to see how long it would take her before she voiced her thoughts. Forty-three minutes and 38 seconds later, there was a shove at the back of his shoulders. He stumbled, catching himself on a tree trunk, and turned to Clarke.

“What the hell?” He demanded, all thoughts of silence and stealth flying out of his head.

“Talk to me!” Clarke yelled back. She stepped closer, her eyes blazing with anger. “Stop treating me like I’m an annoying child and talk to me.”

She was so close. Bellamy could reach out, touch her chin, kiss her. It would be easy. “I have nothing to say to you,” he said instead, his voice level.

“The hell you don’t,” she replied, shoving at his chest. “You always have something to say.”

He laughed, a harsh, bitter sound. “You don’t know me, Clarke. You don’t know a damn thing.” He saw hesitation in her expression. “Now leave me alone.” He walked away. Clarke stood where she was, unmoving, but Bellamy walked away from her. And he would have kept going, too, if he hadn’t heard her quiet voice, her broken tone.

“You’re hurt.”

That was it. That was all it took for Bellamy to completely lose control of every single emotion that he had bottled up and buried in the weeks since Polis.

“Hurt?” he repeated, spitting out the word as if it tasted bad on his tongue. “I’m not _hurt,_ Clarke. I’m angry. I’m furious. Four months ago I asked you to have a drink with me. You left. And you almost died because of it. Three weeks ago I asked you to come back to Arkadia with me and you refused again. You have no idea the hell that I’ve been through because of you.”

Bellamy could see the hesitation in Clarke’s expression. He wanted to take advantage of it. He wanted to shove his anger in her face, make her understand what she put him through. He wanted her to feel as bad as he did.

“Our people died in Mount Weather. Someone who I thought was a friend betrayed us. Without batting an eyelash. My girlfriend fucking died, Clarke.” He stepped closer to her. A sick satisfaction welled up in his chest when she took a step back. “I asked you to come back with me. You could have let Kane stay. Or Abby, who is the actual Chancellor, who is actually in charge around here. But you stayed. And all you could say to me was ‘I’m sorry.’” Bellamy looked over her, disgust clouding his eyes. “You’re not sorry. You’re selfish.”

Clarke’s voice was barely a whisper. “I had to do it.”

“No, you didn’t.” Bellamy shook his head. He took a step back, suddenly overwhelmed by the sight of her wide blue eyes and open, honest expression. He took a deep breath. Squared his jaw. Resolved to finish what he had started. “You keep telling yourself that. You had a choice, Clarke. And you made your choice. But you lost me in the process, and that’s on you. That’s something you need to deal with alone. I’m not going to help you with this one.”

Bellamy walked away then, leaving her open-mouthed and teary-eyed. As much as he wanted to pretend that he didn’t give a damn, there was a sharp ache in his chest that made him want to run back to her and hold her to his chest, promise that things were going to be okay as long as the two of them were together.

He kept walking.


End file.
